Welcome, new readers! Every Friday I write a 7 Quick Takes post where I share seven random tidbits. Below my seven things you’ll see links to other bloggers’ 7 Quick Takes posts at their blogs — be sure to check those out as well. Enjoy!
— 1 —
So, wow. Yesterday’s post really blew up. With 100+ comments in a matter of hours, it almost broke the record for most comments in a single day. Notice the “almost.” For while the topic of society’s views about openness to children is a subject that elicits great passion, that stirs people’s deepest emotions, there is still one subject that touches the human soul more; a subject that still holds the Most Comments in a Single Day record here at Conversion Diary. And that would be: Trucknutz.
— 2 —
I want to state upfront that I am not lying about what I am about to say next, nor am I exaggerating. I just had to get that out there. Because if you saw last week’s 7 Quick Takes post, you might read what I’m about to say next and roll your eyes. You might be tempted to say to yourself, “Okay, Jen jumped the shark with this one. She must think that this ‘I AM SURROUNDED BY INFESTATIONS OF FREAKISH CREATURES’ shtick will get traffic to her blog, and has now stooped to just making stuff up. Sad, really.” But no. No. It is 100% true that I went from battling scorpions at my house to sleeping on a rat-infested couch at a friend’s house. But I’m getting ahead of myself…
— 3 —
“I’m just glad to be in a house where I don’t need to worry about freaky critters crawling on me in the night!” I said when I arrived at my friend Hallie‘s house on Friday. If it had been a movie, there would have been a close-up on my face and some ominous music swelling in the background as if to say HUBRIS ALERT! HORRIFIC LESSON COMING UP SOON!
So on Saturday night Hallie and I were chatting before I went to sleep on their couch, and I see the blood drain from her face. She stared in terror at something behind me, tracking it as it moved quickly across the room. Then she started screaming. Based on her reaction, I knew it was either:
- A man in a ski mask wielding a chainsaw
- A zombie
- A portal into hell (umm, moving from the left to the right side of the room)
- A rodent
It was D. A rat. A big one. Her husband got up and looked for it, but it had disappeared into the shadows. And that is when I learned: The only thing worse than seeing a rat where you’re about to go to sleep is not seeing one but knowing it’s there, somewhere.
Hallie’s husband kindly offered to trade places with me and let me sleep in their room, but I declined. As I drifted off to sleep, I contented myself with the knowledge that the rat was undoubtedly far, far, FAR away from me at that very moment…
— 4 —
…In the middle of the night I woke up to a gnawing sound. Was it something I was doing? I lay completely still, and listened. Zzzhhh-rrrrr-zzzhhh-rrrrr. No. It wasn’t me. It was coming from inside the couch. What on earth could that be? I thought. Weird. I rolled over and went back to sleep. Now, I’m not sure exactly how that calculation went. I must have been incredibly groggy to think RAT SIGHTING TEN FEET AWAY FROM COUCH + GNAWING SOUND COMING FROM WITHIN COUCH = WEIRD, MUST BE NOTHING.
What happened next is a story so epic that I must simply direct you to Hallie’s post with all the details (not one you want to read while eating, or if you have any plans to eat within the next 12 hours). Suffice it to say, the rat we’d seen had returned to its nest in the couch where I was sleeping, and that noise I’d heard was the sounds of an active, thriving rat’s nest just a few inches below me.
— 5 —
I don’t know. I don’t get it. Why is it that God’s plan for my life involves exposure to every nasty creature within a 10 mile radius of wherever I am at any given moment? Some things we cannot know this side of heaven. But let me say this: if you live in an area where there have ever been sightings of black widows, brown recluses, rattlesnakes, killer bees, crocodiles, poison dart frogs or king cobras, I am not coming to visit. And — trust me — you do not want me to.
— 6 —
Anyway, other than the vermin it was a lovely weekend. The baptism was beautiful, and it was wonderful to meet my new goddaughter in person. Here’s a picture of us:
— 7 —
I am looking forward to having an easy, relaxing weekend. We have no plans, other than simply to enjoy not killing rats and scorpions. What are you up to this weekend?
Below is a linky list if you’d like to add a link to your own 7 Quick Takes post. (1) Make sure the link you submit is to the URL of your post and not your main blog URL. (2) Include a link back here.