— 1 —
I try not to use my blog as a platform for ungrateful whining about the inconveniences of my overall lovely life (that’s what Twitter‘s for). But let me just get this off my chest so that the rest of this post doesn’t have a decidedly passive aggressive, there’s-something-on-my-mind-that-I’m-not-saying feel to it: This is the worst third trimester I’ve had yet. (Well, I guess being debilitated by a life-threatening, excruciating blood clot was a little worse, but at least then I was under doctor’s orders to take a lot of Vicodin.) I feel like I’m 80 weeks pregnant — and, judging by the frequent “DUE ANY MINUTE NOW, HUH?” comments I’m getting, I evidently look like it too. The due date is more than a month and a half away. I’m not sleeping well. I have the mobility of a beached whale on Quaaludes. Constant heartburn. Frequent nausea. Giving myself shots in the stomach every day is getting old. I’m tired, all the time. Did I mention I’m tired?
Okay, I feel better now that I got that off my chest. I have a lot of support, so it’s really fine. I think a lot of my frustration comes from the fact that it all caught me off guard — it wasn’t like this for the previous four pregnancies. On the plus side, I have renewed sympathy for my friends who experience this every time around!
— 2 —
People are sometimes surprised when one of my takes on my pregnancy woes is, “Thank goodness I have four other kids!” It seems like it would make it harder, but, as I mentioned back when I had morning sickness, in many ways it’s easier. Especially that they’re close in age (ages 6, 4, 3, and 2), they can easily play together. Meal times and bath times are definitely hard since none of the kids are old enough to help much (by “hard” I mean “I don’t know how my husband and I survive, ” “Homer would not have been equipped to chronicle the epic nature of this endeavor”), but other than that I’m able to get long stretches of time where I can prop my feet up and watch the kids play, only exerting myself when I lean forward to say something like, “GET THAT CUP AWAY FROM THE TOILET.”
— 3 —
This would be a good time to have a documentary crew come to my house for a full day to film my life to show the world what people of faith are like, right? Yeah. I don’t know what I was thinking either. A local production company contacted me about participating in a series of short videos about people with different faith perspectives. I was very impressed with the organization and their mission and felt a great urge to support what they’re doing, and somehow that translated to “Sure, you can follow me around from 8:00 AM until 5:00 PM next Wednesday and film every single thing I do!” I really doubt that either I or my husband will have the energy to get the house in the shape I would normally like to have it in for such an event (you know, so that I could give a properly utterly unrealistic example of how we really live), so we might be keepin’ it real real for this one.
I’m having nightmares about one day hearing someone say, “I watched this short film about a woman named Jennifer Fulwiler, and learned that people who convert to Catholicism are cantankerous slobs who spend a lot of time on their couches.”
— 4 —
My husband and son followed the instructions here to make this crazy-powerful water bottle rocket launcher. The thing is insane. It shoots plastic bottles a few yards higher than the roof of the tallest house. To understand how the other males in the neighborhood have reacted to this thing, you’d have to picture that scene from 2001: A Space Odyssey where the monolith shows up: Monkeys from all over the land come out of caves and crevices to approach it slowly, trembling with trepidatious awe, terrified yet overjoyed, Also Sprach Zarathustra booming in the background. That’s pretty much how it was in our front yard yesterday afternoon.
Mommy No-Fun finally had to suggest that we wrap it up at 8:15 since, you know, the kids might want to eat dinner at some point. But I have a feeling that the whooshing sound of a launching bottle followed by calls of “WHOOOOOOO-HOO!” will be the soundtrack to my summer.
— 5 —
God allowed us to have the internet so that this video could be created. It’s French Star Wars with subtitles by Sartre. (Thank you to Mrs. Darwin, who emailed it to me with the subject: “Existential despair — with light sabers!”)
— 6 —
I feel like I’m a real reader now, because I’ve finally branched out into fiction! I recently read not one, but two fiction books: The Kite Runner and The Help . Even though fiction still isn’t totally my cup of tea, I did very much enjoy both books. In particular, The Kite Runner was helpful to me as I dabble at revisions for my book since it’s in the style of a memoir. It was interesting to see how the author structured things, how much of the character’s inner thoughts he revealed, how he moved through time, etc. Both books were incredibly well written. Both of those authors have a staggering level of talent.
— 7 —
Today at the Register I have suggestions for six unique, free and meaningful Mother’s Day gifts (it’ll be up after 7 AM). Happy Mother’s Day! And a special nod to those women who desire to be mothers but have not had that dream fulfilled yet. You’ll be in my thoughts and prayers this weekend.
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