I‘m getting ready for a quick trip to Columbus, OH, for a taping of the EWTN show The Journey Home. I’m a longtime fan of Marcus Grodi, the show’s host, and am looking forward to meeting Producer Scott Scholten as well. I’m honored and excited to be part of the program.
I do wish, though, that I could beam myself there a la Star Trek. I overbooked myself with travel this Spring, and am very ready to stay home for a long and unbroken stretch. I have no other travel scheduled until the CNMC in Dallas (which is in August, and you need to be planning to attend). Between now and then, there is about to be some Olympian chilling happening over here.
Because I am both vain and nerdy, I put way too much analysis into what to wear on television; I consider the camera angle, the lighting, the background colors, etc. The Journey Home studio poses a particular challenge. As you can see from Dr. Kevin Vost’s appearance, there’s a cornflower blue wall in the background, and then a gold-framed painting with red and black tones in it. This is very confusing to someone who is fashion illiterate in the first place. Would red clash too much with the blue wall? Would blue clash with the red in the painting? White is out because camera lights make it look like you’re glowing, and black is out because on TV screens it makes you look like a blob. Anyway, combine these woes with a heaping dose of I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR and a dash of extra-dramatic Nothing Looks Good on Me Anyway™, and there is going to be a serious wardrobe crisis in this house by the end of the day.
Important note to self: If you take a bunch of pictures of yourself with your smartphone in the process of finding something to wear, remember to delete them before travel!!!!!!!
Pardon me for that interruption. You see, this is a lesson I have learned more than once, always the hard way. As you may have experienced, travel often presents opportunities for sharing pictures of the kids. You get in a conversation about family with the person next to you on the plane, you meet new friends at the event and they ask about the kids, and next thing you know it’s time to pull out the phone and scroll through a few shots.
This is all fine for most people. But combine it with that vain/nerdy thing I talked about in #2, and what happens is that before I travel for any kind of event where I am contractually obliged not to look like a slob, I take a bunch of pictures to check my outfits. Then, I’ll break out the phone during some social event, saying, “Oh, just yesterday I got the cutest shot of all the kids playing in the yard!”, but instead of a precious family moment, it’s a shot of me taking a picture of myself in the mirror. “Heh-heh. It’s right here somewhere…” I say as I scroll past it. To another self-portrait. And other one. And another one. Long story short, I give up before I find the pictures of the kids, and my acquaintances start backing away slowly from the insane woman who just showed everyone an entire series of pictures she took of herself in the mirror.
Over at the Register I’m talking about how I am incredibly lazy and yet have learned to kind of like exercise (the post will be up around 5 AM Central), which prompts me to ask: What is your favorite workout music? I need some good new high-energy songs.
Oh gosh. I had written up a list of my favorite workout songs for that last take…then I Googled them so I could link to iTunes or Youtube videos. And, uhh…let’s just say that I’ll be skipping my own recommendations for this round, and have learned a few things from this experience:
- There is a strong correlation between fabulous dance remixes and graphic homoerotic album artwork.
- Some people who create music with great beats also really hate the Catholic Church.
- I am perhaps not as discerning as I should be about the music I listen to while I jog.
Thus, in lieu of my real recommendations, I am going to lie and tell you that I listen only to Gregorian Chant when I run.
My Journey Home episode will air at something-something time, on something date. I’m kind of overwhelmed and can’t look up that email right now. I’ll update you when I can find it. Meanwhile, you can look forward to likely live-tweeted panic attacks on Twitter when I’m flying on Sunday and Monday.
Have a great weekend!