Whew! Now that everything is up and running perfectly on the new host, I’m just kicking back and watching my pages load at lightning speed while I sip a glass of lemonade! Oh, wait. I’m thinking of the alternate universe where it is not my destiny to be plagued with endless problems related to my website. Here in this dimension, the mind-meltingly frustrating feed issue is back, and I am on a journey of discovery in which I learn just how vastly different client-side and server-side traffic analysis programs can be (more on that in #2). I’m at the point where I may stop messing around with SFTP clients and staging servers and start praying the St. Jude novena for hopeless causes instead.
I learned something interesting about Google Analytics: evidently it misses a lot of traffic. A lot. Like, according to my new web host, I have 5X the number of monthly visits that Google Analytics reports (and since Sitemeter uses similar technology, presumably it has the same problems too). This forum comment tells the story of a guy who tested Analytics on his own website and had it miss a lot of the visits.
This is great news for people who were casually wondering what kind of readership they might have to their blogs. It is a totally-game-changing (and-not-in-a-good-way) revelation for people who have just signed up for hosts who charge by amount of traffic.
I know, I know, you’re hoping that I’ll spend more time whining about my hosting woes. You don’t feel like you have sufficient information on this subject, and you’re worried that there might be some annoying technical minutiae that I have not told you about. There is! But unfortunately only Dorian is privy to that kind of excitement. She’s lucky enough to be the single recipient of the Jen’s Hosting Angst email list, which is written in all caps, updated hourly, and has no Unsubscribe option.
For the first time in over a decade, I got nervous about buying alcohol the other night. I found myself standing in the grocery store checkout line, rehearsing my “I forgot my ID” line as my heart raced in anticipation of the big moment. Allow me to explain how I found myself in this situation:
My amazing mother offered to take all six kids for a couple of hours on Tuesday evening. Joe and I were happy about the offer (read: we fell on the floor sobbing tears of ecstatic joy), and decided that we simply must have a glass of wine to celebrate. So Joe stopped at the store on his way home from work…only to discover that he didn’t have his debit card because I’d borrowed it recently. He was beyond frustrated, mainly because going to the house to get the card then back out to the store would waste precious babysitting time, so I offered to go to the store immediately. I figured I could run down there and back in the time it would take him to get through traffic to come home.
So there I was, meandering through the beer and wine section of our grocery store, chatting with Joe on my cell phone about which varietal would most bless us this evening, when I realized with abject horror: I DIDN’T HAVE MY $%^#! CARD EITHER. I had left my wallet in the computer bag I’ve been taking to coffee shops when I work on the book. If I were to drive all the way back to the house to get it and do another store trip, my mom would be dropping off the kids at the same time I returned with the wine.
Just when I was about to stand in the center of the Merlot section and shake my fist at the heavens to decry this cruel fate, I remembered: I still had Joe’s card. The laundry situation has been a little dicey lately, and therefore the card was still in the pocket of the jeans I was wearing when I got it (procrastination: it always pays off). So I would be able to get the wine…as long as they didn’t ask to see ID.
“Well that should be noooo problem, ” says anyone who’s reading this and has seen me in person lately. You’d think. But evidently our grocery store has some policy that they have to see ID if you look a day younger than 80, and I do sometimes get carded. It was like I was 19 all over again as I scanned the checkout stands to see which employee looked coolest. Oddly, as I stood in line, I was not any less nervous than I used to be now that I would not actually be lying when I said I forgot my ID. (For the record, nobody ever believed me when I was 19.)
The checker did not card me — perhaps because she wanted to get the crazy woman who kept making loud comments about how she has six kids and some early arthritis pain out of her line as fast as possible — and Joe and I had a lovely time catching up over our glasses of hard-earned wine.
I loved all the suggestions about light fiction last week! I wish I had time to do a summary of everyone’s recommendations, but here are a few of the titles that multiple people raved about:
Can’t wait to check some of these out!
Speaking of books, Ignatius is getting into the fiction game. I don’t think I’m being biased because they’re my publisher when I say that this book looks really good:
Keep praying for Dwija and her baby! Also, Cari is hosting a fundraiser to help Dwija’s family fix their laundry room. If you feel moved to offer a donation, I know they’d really appreciate it!