Office haikus

December 12, 2006 | 11 comments

I think we could all use a break for a moment from debating the great questions of God and man, so I offer you today a topic we can all agree on: work sucks. Someone sent me a copy of this little book called Office Haikus, and it is killing me. Where was this when I had a job? An example:

In my cubicle
I sit; envying the dead
Two hours left to go.

And one more:

Single occupant
Bathroom is locked. Why knock? Door
Didn’t lock itself.

If you’re ordering Christmas presents from Amazon, throw this one in as well for yourself or your favorite cubicle-dweller. It is hilarious.


  1. Professor Chaos

    The clock just struck nine.
    Only eight hours to go.
    Somebody shoot me.

    I never professed to be a poet.

    Nice link, Jen!

  2. Jennifer F.

    Love it! Very nice! You’ve inspired me:

    Sitting here in my
    Pajamas. Thank God you can’t
    Die from not sleeping.

    Uhh, yeah. Looks like I need some more coffee. 🙂

  3. Mike J

    Staring at the screen.
    Eye strain is taking its toll.
    Deadline’s tomorrow.

    There you have..

    My contribution.
    Although, if the truth be told,
    I do like my job.

  4. Anonymous

    I’m not that creative, I leave it up to the demotivators at to humor me.

  5. Amber

    Oh wow, that great. I can really relate to that first one, it reminds me of the first job I had out of college. It started off well, then we got a new manager who kept telling everyone that his staff was too busy and was giving away all of our work to other groups. Meanwhile, we all sat in stifling boredom, trying in vain to stretch two hours worth of work into eight or more.

    That really seems like a different lifetime at this point…

  6. SteveG

    Another damn card.
    Five more dollars down the drain.
    There better be cake.

  7. Jerret

    I am unemployed
    I wake up past noon daily
    Sucks to have a job.

    Take that, workers :P.

  8. Anonymous

    That hurt Jerret…..that really. hurt. 😛

    Don’t worry though, you’ll get yours. 😉

  9. Kasia

    Paper cuts abound.
    Year-end appeals are brutal.
    Three thousand to go.


    Paying the mortgage
    Means I must come here daily.
    Well, it beats mooching.

    (That last one was for you, Jerret, since you were so generous with your own talents. 🙂 )

  10. Jerret

    Ouch, saw that coming :P.

  11. Mike J

    Here’s reality for my workplace these days:

    Workload is crushing.
    And it’s been this way for months.
    Still no end in sight.

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