Why are you reading this blog when you could be reading Camp Patton?

May 21, 2012 | 16 comments

Camp Patton, the reason God gave us mommyblogs

I’m still in the land of Can’t Deal over here, which is good news for you since my inability to form words with my keyboard* has prompted me to do another undiscovered gems** post where I enlighten you about internet awesomeness of which you may have been heretofore unaware. Today’s gem: Camp Patton!

I don’t know whether it’s been good or bad for me that I discovered Grace Patton’s blog. On the plus side, her dry humor and concise writing style bless me with posts that don’t take a lot of time to read but always leave me either laughing, crying (from laughing), or shouting “SOMEONE ELSE UNDERSTANDS MY LIFE!” at my computer monitor. On the down side, I spent way too much time hitting Refresh on her homepage to see if she’s updated, and have a nagging sense that I cannot consider my life complete until I have read every post in her archives.

Not only has her Simon Says series convinced me that her husband and mine were separated at birth, but it has inspired other bloggers to round up “best of” quotes from their husbands that are equal in excellence (that last link coins the term “snacking trousers” — don’t miss it). Grace also introduced me to the use of the term “pre-game” as a verb, is crafty in ways that people like me can only imagine, and even manages to be funny about thyroid cancer.

And for the bonus round, her husband Simon is in residency to become an OB-GYN specializing in Natural Family Planning***. How cool is that? And just listen to how she suffers so that Simon can one day provide the world with quality pro-life medical care:

I’ve been moving one step forward and two steps back in the housework, patience, and personal appearance realms. Armed with a broom and baby wipes, I’m in a constant war with Julia’s breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner, snack, dessert, snack leftovers strewn about the house. Julia is put in her timeout spot more frequently every day for bopping Sebastian over the head. And while I was filling out paperwork at a recent appointment, I was asked if I worked outside the home with a tone that makes me fairly certain the kind gentleman had already clicked, “no!!!!” using my momfit (ill-fitting jeans, sweater over turtleneck and one pearl in left ear) and mom scent (casserole of spit up, toddler breath and a perfume mask) as telling indicators.

So, there you go. I recently emailed Grace and promised to share my husband’s super secret margarita recipe that he’s spent years perfecting (YEARS) if she promises to update her blog twice a day, so hopefully there will be many more posts to come. Enjoy!

* I’ve hired a trained monkey to write my Register posts.

** I know, I know, someone is going to point out that everyone already reads Grace Patton’s blog and it’s not exactly “undiscovered.” I simply mean “undiscovered by me, ” and “I spend an embarrassing amount of time staring at her website and wanted to share it with you all but didn’t know how else to categorize such a post so I put it in ‘undiscovered gems.'”

*** Yes, I did have to double-check to make sure I knew that because Grace said it publicly and not from Google stalking her.


  1. Hallie @ Betty Beguiles

    I am a card-carrying lifetime member of the Grace Patton Fan Club. As you know. 😉

  2. Cari

    Not to brag or anything, but I do have a semi-binding arranged marriage contract between Julia and one of my boys. This should provide yeeearrrs of blog fodder for Grace.

    • Dwija {House Unseen}

      No way, Cari. Julia is marrying Paul. Veronica can have Sebastian. It’s only fair.

  3. Katie@NFP and Me

    Isn’t she the best? And she does all of those sewing projects! Go Grace!

  4. Heather

    Believe it or not, I am the other last person on the planet to hear about that blog. What a funny writer she is. I really enjoyed her posts and had a good laugh over the Simon Says portions. Thanks for sharing this with us.

  5. Katie @ Wellness Mama

    Wow… thanks for linking! I’ve been reading her blog for the last half hour… hilarious! Hope things get better for you soon… Prayers! 🙂

  6. Kayla

    I am a long time devoted fan of the awesome hilarity that is Grace. I feel like I am always emailing her about how much her blog improves my life or how we should be next door neighbors someday.

  7. Colleen Martin

    I love me some Grace blogging too 🙂 And you’re so sweet to point it out to others since you’ve got like, what, a million bazillion readers? Even just a comment on someone’s blog from you makes me want to read it!!

  8. Cari

    I’m sorry Borobia. I’ve formed a deep, unbreakable attachment to Julia through my blogstalking. I can’t let her go. Now if you can offer up one of YOUR daughters for one of my sons, so somehow we can create a vaguely creepy Catholic interbreeding program and I can still see Julia daily, then we’ll talk.

    • dweej

      Well, Cecilia is marrying Gabriel…unless THAT’S who you’ve picked for Julia, in which case BOTH my plans are foiled and I’m going to go eat ice cream.

      See what you’ve done, woman?

  9. Amy E

    I recently found Grace too (thru Betty Beguiles, I believe). I love her hubby is in the residence program. I live near St. Louis and delivered all my babies at Mercy (what used to be known as St. John’s Mercy). I ended up there looking for a pro-life doctor who could read NFP charts, and lo and behold I found one of only two in the whole St. Louis area (at that time, 10 years ago). It’s so, so important for women to have access to doctors who can read those charts. Each of my babies chart due date was weeks after my period dating, I would have been induced early every single time. Plus, it’s nice to not have a doctor suggest birth control pills for every female issue you run across. Love Dr. Danis at Mercy Family Medicine…he’s been known to take residents out to lunch to talk to them about NFP, which one of them told me they never even heard about in med school! I’m happy to hear about the new residence program thru Grace Patton.

  10. Kris

    I found Grace through Betty Beguiles. But now you’ve directed me to “Time Flies” and I’ve got ANOTHER Catholic-mommy blog to check. Sigh. Good thing it’s summertime, the kids can all swim, and there is wi-fi at the pool.

    Keeping up the prayers for you.

  11. Jennifer G.

    So…I’m inlove! I don’t let many into my Google Reader, but this blog shall be allowed! Thanks for the rec!

  12. cristmae

    Don’t feel bad about it,everything has a reason and God is always watching our way to guide us in the right path.Just be patient and everything will be fine.

  13. Jeannine

    Thank you so much for linking to this blog — what a natural gift for humor! I started reading, and kept reading, and reading…

    Such a blessing to make others laugh!

  14. Roger Iverson

    This is a wonderful post. I loved those links you shared.


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